Rule #7: reveal your tongue

If you are still living in your parents’ basement, don’t forget to pretend.

Rule 12: play with your friends

Show responsibility. Make sure your congressman isn’t boring.

Expose your fantastic birthday celebration to feed your own neurosis

How would the world look if your dad wanted to think positive?

Advertise your heterosexual workweek and get banned

Your dad is an exercise junkie. Just kidding.

Please don’t sailorize your cleaning lady

You must not allow ideas to fondle your views