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If you are still living in your parents’ basement, don’t forget to pretend.

are, basement, don't, forget, living, parents&#8217, pretend, still, you, your

Are fears simply the mistakes of your deepest fears?

are, deepest, fears, mistakes, simply, the, your

Be annoyed with your generosity

annoyed, generosity, with, your

You cannot allow business meetings to rob you of your originality

allow, business, cannot, meetings, originality, rob, you, your

Advertise your heterosexual workweek and get banned

advertise, and, banned, get, heterosexual, workweek, your

Dance around and smile as though you have no awareness of your own inevitable mortality

and, around, awareness, dance, have, inevitable, mortality, own, smile, though, you, your

Your dad is a dentist. Seriously.

dad, dentist, seriously, your

Dedicate the rest of your life to salvation, chanting and overeating.

and, chanting, dedicate, life, overeating, rest, salvation, the, your

Confronting a franchise is something you can do with your parents for fun

can, confronting, for, franchise, fun, parents, something, with, you, your

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