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Your dad is a dentist. Seriously.

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A shot of heroin might just be the solution to all of your problems

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Your dad is an exercise junkie. Just kidding.

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Your body is 1 percent Vegetarian, and 99 percent fat.

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Advertise your heterosexual workweek and get banned

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Maybe human souls can change our outlook of challenges if you free your mind?

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Crash and burn, play hard ball and always look at your own grave

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Expose your fantastic birthday celebration to feed your own neurosis

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Only when you open your eyes to the true nature of eternal happiness, will you confront illusions.

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Recent Quotes

Keep performing. Quit complying.
Thank you bees, for being so beautiful
Sanitize uncertainty
You are considerate. You are likable. You are fine.
Quit talking
You seem to be the kind of mother who advices their children to want to break into song

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