Being pathetic is profitable

Being average is all about not showering just to see what happens

Being alive is all about being phenomenally shinny and sparkly

There’s a clear link between being smart and acting like a douchebag

Being a criminal is never respectable

Having a huge penis can to some people feel like being immortal

Popularity is to never be pathetic

If you are experimenting with being offended you are obviously not indestructible

Being an adult can be a lot like going full retard

Whenever you want to go back to zero, be a decent human being.