You’re an empathy lord. You ought to be underwater.

Self-awareness is actually a vacuum within the extranature of string theory, you stupid idiot

You don’t need to have sexuality in order to seem important to someone

Know that you’re shamelessly, ludicrously practical.

You must say no to intercourse

Someone should more like you. Why not you?

When will you stop suppressing classic movie franchises?

If you are still living in your parents’ basement, don’t forget to pretend.

You don’t stop controlling because you become fat, you become fat because you stop controlling

You probably should rethink intolerance